


teardrops on the fire

by seemeeimbeebee



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Neverland Renaissance 2.0, Swan Believer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2016-06-12
Packaged: 2018-07-14 16:58:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7181348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seemeeimbeebee/pseuds/seemeeimbeebee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma starts listening for Henry's cries among the Lost Boys.</p>
            </blockquote>





	teardrops on the fire

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired by the list of Neverland Renaissance 2.0 prompts on Tumblr and I thought I'd take a whack at one. Technically two, I guess. Enjoy!

She started listening for Henry’s voice among their cries. While the low, plaintive howl is so many blended voices into one, she wanted...something. A noise builds in her chest and for a moment, she’s tempted to join the Lost Boys because does she feel abandoned and alone.

She just hoped to whatever power that exists that Henry doesn’t feel that way right now.

 _Kid, your grandparents are here. Your Mom, Regina, is here._ I’m _here. Please don’t give up on me, Henry. Please. You are never going to be alone again. Not as long as I’m here. Just hold on._

(She used to talk to him before he came to find her. Regina said he used to do the same thing and pretend she was there when he thought no one was home. Knowing that made the magic under her finger tips hum contently, and she as she might, she couldn’t push that feeling away. Then again, she was always helpless to the feelings Henry evoked in her.)

_Can you hear me now?_

She closed her eyes tighter and pictured her son’s wide smile in her mind’s eye. The feel of his tiny arms wrapped around her, and the way his head feels pressed tightly against her chest. Even though her eyes are closed, she can feel the sob clawing its way out of her throat.

She had not believed in much these days, but she would always believe in her son. He somehow had become the one thing she always would believe in. 

(Seven, and looking up at the sky through an open window. ”How come they don’t want me? Why did they leave?”she asked the stars, tears streaming down her face. Someone once told her that the brightest star was the Blue Fairy. The Blue Fairy would grant her wishes. 

If only she knew back then.)

_Why am I alone? Why am I the only one who feels this way?_

“Swan?”  


She flinched unintentionally, her eyes flying open. Killian--no, _Hook_ , she told herself firmly--hovered over her, his brow furrowed in poorly disguised concern. She sat up, trying to hide her face from him. “It’s nothing. I’m fine, Hook. Go back to your watch duty.”

He had the good sense to back off and disappear for a moment before returning with a leaf filled with water. “For your ‘nothing’,” he said, careful to keep his tone as neutral as possible. 

“Thanks,” Emma muttered, taking the leaf from him. She splashed the water on her face and took a few deep breaths to try and calm herself down.   


Hook sat beside her, careful to keep his distance. They both sat in silence.

(”This is nice,” Henry piped up from his comic books, sprawled out across the couch. “Just you and me here. Even if we’re not talking, we’re together.”)

“I can’t hear him,” Hook finally said. “Your boy, I mean. I don’t hear his voice in the cries.”  He paused, and he added, “If you listen closely, the one that hitches and starts with a downward inflection is Kaui. The one that sounds more like a scream is Simon. The one that hitches twice is Claude. If you hear a--”  


“What?” she asked softly, looking over at him. Suddenly, the humidity of the island choked her, trying to suffocate her. Or maybe the look in Hook’s suddenly too blue eyes--alert and focused--that were trained in her. For a moment, she could see the lieutenant he had once been.   


“It’s the Lost Boys crying, keeping you awake, isn’t it?” he asked, scratching behind his ear, his cheeks flushed with either the heat or embarrassment. “I lived on this island for two centuries. I know their cries.”

“And you’re telling me this because?” Emma asked, trying to keep the edge out of her voice. 

“I didn’t want your cries to join them.” She choked on a sob, drowning in his sincerity as he added, “You know what it was like, and you don’t want the same for him. So you listen, to hold on hope that you did better for him than you had for yourself.”

“How do you know?” Emma asked softly, unable to look away, determined not to cry in front of him.

“Open book, remember?” he murmured softly, grinning as his voice lilted teasingly. 

“Yeah, that or you’ve somehow got the SparkNotes edition,” Emma muttered. She gave him something of a half smile before staring back at the quietly roaring fire. She licked her lips nervously before asking, “Do you ever get used to it? To their cries?” 

“You get used to everything,” Hook replied, like he was replacing “everything” with “sorrow”. Emma sighed, tucking her knees to her chest and placing her forehead against them. 

 _I’m not giving up on you, Henry. I am_ never _giving up on you._

“If he were here...what would you say to him?” 

(”I love you, Henry,” she whispered tearfully. She had been too late. She was always too late, always going to be alone. But he had to know. She had to say it just once.)

“I’d tell him...I don’t know,” Emma sighed, rubbing her face, her knees still tucked against her chest. “There’s so much I’d want to say.”  


Hook smiled thinly, looking up at the stars. She was grateful for it. Because sometimes, he was right and she couldn’t handle it. 

“What would you want someone to tell you?” he asked. “If you were him, I mean.”

“I was him,” Emma said, more to herself than anything. 

She knew he’d deny it if she ever asked, but she could’ve sworn he mumbled into the wind, “So was I.” 

Honesty. He’d given her that. She was more than capable of returning that. “I’d want...I _do_ want someone to tell me that I’m not alone.”   


_That it’s okay for me to feel like this._

He lowered his head and looked back at her. 

She understood.

_You are not alone, Emma._


End file.
